Quest for Love
by TheHollowQueen
Summary: James yearns for Lily's love while she tries to push him away ignoring her feelings. You already know the ending but this is what happens in between. UNFINISHED.
1. Chapter 1

She was walking away from me, both in reality and in my mind. That was the 45th time she had rejected me. I was so far gone I was counting the amount of times.

"She probably doesn't realise it Prongs."

Sirius laid a hand on my shoulder and directed me to the couch. I sank down onto it grateful for its comfort. I lowered my head recalling the days when I watched her from afar, not letting my heart be crumpled every time. A lone tear escaped from my eye.

"Lighten up," he playfully barged into my shoulder "she doesn't know what she's missing." "You're right! Loads of girls would kill for me, I'm one of the marauders! No girl gets me down!" With saying that I stood up and turned to Sirius. Dimly I remembered the very reason I was trying to boost my confidence. "Everyone of them except Lily Evans..."

* * *

"Obnoxious, arrogant, self-centered..." I kept saying these words to myself. I couldn't let him take me over, the way his hazel eyes swept over me creating shivers down my back, the way his mouth would move when he was talking to me, the way-

"Lily! Where were you? I was looking for you everywhere."

Severus enveloped me in a hug. I momentarily froze before relaxing into it, he was my best friend ever since I learned that I possessed magic. He had stood by me when my sister shouted at me. I had nothing to fear. So why was I hesitating?

* * *

James' mood had darkened by the time he had reached the third floor corridor. It was about to get worse. Clutched in the embrace of Snivellus was Lily Evans. His pale hand was clutched in her hair while the other rested on the small of her back. Lily's hands were clutching his back seeking his comfort. James saw red, his eyes clouding over with envy and hate. The embrace ended and to his horror saw that she was crying softly. Snivellus brushed away the tears with his thumb and smiled at her gently. His eyes darkened in colour and he would have marched over had it been for Sirius dragging him into an empty classroom. "What are you doing?! I need to rescue her!" James struggled against his best friends grasp yearning to help his love.

"Does she look like she needs rescuing?" Sirius asked patiently letting James peep through the door. Lily was smiling at Snivellus and let him escort her to potions. James hung his head in shame and put his face in his hands.

"I feel terrible..."

"Don't be, you acted because you thought she was in trouble." He gently opened the door and pushed James through. "Lets get to potions then, we're probably late now."


	2. Chapter 2

Walking into potions that morning I noticed how Severus had let me go just before we reached the door and pushed roughly past me to head towards the rest of the slytherins. I hoped that one day he would realise what terrible company he kept and sit next to me for once. All alone on one of the tables I knew that I didn't have any friends (except Severus), that no-one liked me and I would sit like this for the rest of the year.

"Mind if I sit here?"

* * *

"Mind if I sit here?"

Lily looked up sharply and stared at me evenly. I immediately put my guard up knowing that one of her retaliations would hit me.

"Fine."

I saw her drop her head and write some notes down. I wasn't expecting this. She was normally like a snapping turtle, an evil kitten, choose what you will but never like this. My heart went into overdrive. Maybe she finally accepted her feelings, maybe she felt the same way and dare I say it, maybe she finally loved me.

"MR POTTER!"

I suddenly realised I had been stood there gaping at her while Professor Slughorn had begun the lesson.

"Are you away with the fairies again, Mr Potter?"

"Wouldn't be the first time Professor, they are gorgeous!"

I sat down with a cheeky grin on my face. A glimpse at Lily's face showed that she was far from amused but I could see a twitch of her lips just before the lesson started. This lesson would be fun.

* * *


	3. Chapter 3

Why, oh why did I let him sit next to me? I only did it so that I could actually sit with someone for once! I know it sounds harsh but its the truth. If he didn't keep staring at me I could be ok with these seating arrangements. The way he was looking at me was creepy. His hazel eyes gazed into mine looking into its depths searching for my soul. He wouldn't find it. I had only bared my soul to one person and that had ended with drastic consequences.

"Lily?"

* * *

"Lily?" She was gazing into my eyes and had been for some time. I didn't want to break it but we had to get the ingredients for the potion. With a startle she came back to reality.

"What potion is it?" she asked still looking dazed.

"Something called Amortentia." I hadn't really been paying attention but for some reason Lily had blushed. The pink lightly sprinkled her cheeks, bringing out the green in her eyes.

"Why are you blushing?" I was genuinely perplexed.

"I-I'm not."

With that she got up from her stool and headed over to the cabinet of ingredients.

"Remember that this is only an imitation of Amortentia and that if taken it will only make you fall in love for a day."

Oh, so that was why.

* * *

I should have known the moment I told him to sit next to me that it would end in a disaster. I'd already been caught staring at him and now I have to suffer making a love potion with him. Everyone in the school knew that he fancied me but I kept pushing him away. He was selfish and only wanted me because I was the only girl in school who he hadn't shagged. My hands balled in fists and I stood more firm as I searched for ingredients. He would never get me even if he tried.


	4. Chapter 4

What was she doing? She had stopped looking and had balled her fists. I was about to get up to see if she needed help when I caught Sirius' eye.

"Does she love you yet?" he mouthed.

I shrugged my shoulders with a big smile on my face. It was then that I noticed that Snivellus was watching us. I poked my tongue at him and winked in Lily's direction.

Bam!

My bum hit the floor. I got my wand out and aimed at Snivellus' chair.

"Evanesco!"

I watched in amusement as he hit the floor with a thump; his chair vanished. I smirked as the rest of the room erupted into laughter.

"Mr Potter and Mr Snape! What are you both doing on the floor?"

This only made the room erupt into more laughter.

"We were resting our legs sir."

"Oh well-just get up off the floor!"

I stood up as did Snivellus and only then did I notice that Lily was the only one who didn't laugh.

* * *

Pathetic. That's what they both were. I saw James wink at me and then the inevitable: a fight. Why couldn't they both just leave me alone? I gathered the ingredients and carried them to my table.

"Lily?"

I looked up and saw his hazel eyes probing into mine. I looked away with a scowl and got to work setting the equipment. We worked in silence except for the odd instruction I gave him. I could feel the silence like a fog working over my body, it was deep and endless. I preferred it this way though. Didn't I?


	5. Chapter 5

Uh oh. I was in trouble. Lily only ignored me when I'd either asked her out or if I'd done something bad. Obviously I'd done something bad as I'd only asked her out this morning. I hated it when this happened. The blank stares, the judging eyes and worst of all the silence.

* * *

"Lily?" I looked up into his eyes. Big mistake. I could feel myself being drawn into them. I shook my head.

"What?"

"I'm sorry."

He looked so sincere that I almost said he was forgiven. Almost. I opened my lips about to tell him to shut up when I was hit on the back of the head with a paper ball. I whirled around looking for the owner. He was easy to pick out. With his golden hair burning in the candle, I could easily see Lucius Malfoy and his slimy grin. I cast a scowl in his direction and turned around again. I unwrapped the paper ball:

_Dearest Lily,_

_I want you. You know I do. I burn f__or your body, your tight- Hahahahahaha, as if I could ever want your filthy mudblood body. Make sure pretty boy next to you doesn't see this or you could end up with something worse._

I let one silent tear crawl down my face and then put it into the fire.

* * *

That bastard! I watched as a lone tear made its way down her soft cheek. My hands balled at their fists and clutched my wand. I spun around and sent a silent jinx towards him.

"_Obscuro"_

Immediately I could tell that it had worked. His posture stiffened and he was clutching the table with a force. He turned towards Goyle.

"Goyle. Look around and tell me who's looking at me. Now."

I saw Goyle take a slow look around the room starting with Sirius. I started to turn around when I found my limbs locked. I couldn't move. I was looking Lucius right in the face. This was bad.


	6. Chapter 6

What is James doing? He had turned around and was looking at Lucius with a manic look in his eyes.

"James..."

I shook him by the arm and immediately drew back. His skin was cold and stiff. I turned around again and started crushing some of the ingredients. Then turned around again. I looked at Lucius and realised what James had done.

"You idiot."

* * *

Oh great, Lily knows now and I thought this couldn't get any worse.

"You idiot." she whispered.

That was uncalled for! I am trying to avenge her and she's calling me an idiot for it! I did it for her! Can't she see that?! Oh wait, she doesn't know that I read it. But that doesn't matter, she's smart, she should know that I'm doing this for her! Goyle's looking at me now. Oh well, I'm not going to back down, I never do.

* * *

The _Obscuro _charm?! What was he thinking?! That could take minutes or weeks to come off! He's in trouble now. These are the times when I question his sanity or mine with his antics. _Leave him, carry on with the potion._ My voice of reason has spoken, I'm just going to leave him to his fate. Nothing bad is going to happen, right?


	7. Chapter 7

_You should do something._ Great, my brain was talking to me. _He did it for you. Its the least you owe him._ I turned towards James again, trying to see which spell Lucius had used. Petrificus Totalus. Damn, that wouldn't wear off till atleast 10mins. Oh well, only one thing for it. "Sorry James." I quickly glanced around the room to check if anyone was watching. Only Sirius. Of course he'd be looking, the nosy git. I'll have to explain it to him in the hospital wing. I hope he doesn't get hurt...

* * *

What is she doing? Lily had scanned the room quickly and was now looking at me as though she was sorry. Why is she sorry? Goyles already talking to Lucius, there is nothing she can do. So what is she doing?

* * *

That looked like it hurt. James was now sprawled on the floor at my feet. _He is really heavy. _Pushing him off the chair was no easy feat but I did it. "Professor! James has fainted."

"Oh dear. Take him to the hospital wing, miss Evans."

It worked. I just have to drag his body up a staircase and through several doors though... "Sir, I can't pick him up myself."

"Oh well, can I have a volunteer to help miss Evans take mr Potter to the hospital wing?"

"I'll do it, sir!"

Oh great. Sirius.


	8. Chapter 8

"Miss Evans, what has happened to mr Potter?"

"Petrificus Totalus miss."

"Lay him down here then Mr Black." Madame Pomfrey directed us to a bed in the far end of the room. Now, I may look like a tough girl but carrying James up from the dungeons had taken its toll on me. So it wasn't really my fault when I let go.

"You idiot!" Sirius yelled.

"It wasn't my fault. Maybe if Potter let up on the pumpkin juice once in awhile he wouldn't be this heavy!"

"Miss Evans and Mr Black, if you would kindly stop bickering and lay down the patient, I will make sure he can contribute to your nonsense."

Madame Pomfrey was always one of the women at this school I'd always looked up to. Her strong attitude towards the students coupled with the generosity of having to deal with patients had always inspired me to be like her. I looked down to James. His hazel eyes glaring at me, his mouth open as he was cursing, his glasses tipped and most importantly of all, the bruise on the top of his head. Quite a sight to be honest.

* * *

"What the hell was she thinking?" I asked Sirius. Lily was the smartest girl in this year, couldn't she have thought of something less painful?

"Lighten up, you were gonna be attacked by Luicius if she hadn't gone and saved your arse! So be a little more grateful."

Great. Lily had just walked through the doors. Her copper hair shining in the light of the candles, her green eyes dazzling turning towards mine and then it changed. Her eyes turned into slits, carefully examining everything that was wrong with me.

"Well James, could have been alot worse."

"Could have been alot better too, Evans!" James spat back.

Oh no. Lily turned visibly pale and was clutching her wand fiercely.

"You ungrateful twit! I just helped you out from getting into something worse. Don't try and talk to me again Potter, that was the last thing I will ever do for you."

Then she stalked out.


End file.
